school starts tomorrow!
as usual, i've not finish my homework and is still in the holiday mood.
it'll be hard to swing back to the studious mood, which in my case is also not very studious.
i am seriously not looking forward to school.
homeworks, tests, exams.
and not forgetting o'level chinese.
it's drawing near.
nervousness.

well, sorry for letting this place rot for like 2 whole weeks.
i am lazy.

anyway. summary of o1chalet.
cosy and yet quite bored out there.
the location is seriously eerie.
just beside old changi hospital.
X\

then xinfang got ill.
then me and fiona were like changing shift.
i do the toweling first then it's fiona's turn.

then on saturday liying wei'en and i went to weixian's house to celebrate wei'ens birthday.
yea, it's like late.
we played mahjong and blackjack at the end.
lady luck wasn't with me.
we bought her a pink cardigan from tom and stef's if i am no wrong.
then cause we all didn't bring much money all of us were trying to dig out money.
it cost 29 bucks.
then we found out all of what the four of us had was 28.95 !
5cents.
><"
luckily liying remembered she still had 2 bucks with her.

anyway, we bought a cake and we sang a birthday song for all four of us.
cause we didn't celebrate liying's birthday this year, and most probably we won't have time to celebrate weixian's birthday.
and yea, its my earliest birthday celebration.
><"
like 5-6 months early?

anyway, may all our wishes come true
=)
love.

first i want to get defensive.
the reason why i didn't post:
my computer is spoilt!
well, the situation is my sister bought a new flat screen monitor for me and my brother.
like, WOW !
yea, but ever heard of the saying 'happiness is short-lived'?
i never heard of it, i experienced it.
=/
we connect the monitor to my cpu ya?
then the first day it was working great!
you have no idea how big that monitor was!
it's HUMONGOUS !
i can see like EVERYTHING !

i tend to f11 all my windows, this monitor is bigger than those f11-ed windows !

yea, than the next day, it stopped working.
keep flashing " NO SIGNAL"
irritated me a lot.

yea, so i am now using my sister computer.
then tomorrow i will be going to jamie's house to do our biology project while playin mahjong.
though we lacked 1 player.
but, never mind.
but, as the germination project is all in the dead computer, i cannot get them out.
x(
very bad.

every time i do project with jamie and joyceT, i always screw up.
like--always.
well, i have to admit i am not a very hardworking person,
no point denying, it's there for everyone to see.
but, seriously, grouping with jamie gives me certain amount of strees, no offence dearest jamie.
yet, time and again i screw up.
><"

and, last thursday, zheng wei and people asked me to watch pirates3 with them.
luckily my dad disallowed.
because-! i totally forgot that i agreed to watch with wei'en joyceT and jamie.
PHEW !
or i think they'll strangle me.
so i'll be watching on wednesday
x)

think tomorrow i'll have a fun day !
we are celebrating wei'en's birthday and treating her at PIZZA HUT LOT 1 !
perhaps the birthday boy benjamin will decide to go too.
okay, forget it.
i just got the reply he's not going.
=(
but, it will still be a fun night out!!



anyway, i am well and over with that cup of tea that don't belong to me.
i am rather relieved than feeling a little lost.
weird, huh.
but, i rather it be this way
^^


well, tingyan is not going to o1chalet.
SPIRIT DAMPER.
every time she cannot go.
i was still thinking of sleeping with her!
as in, having girls' talk.
it's been a while since i talk to her face to face already.
just when i want to become great friends with her, we got separated.
but, it's the decision i've made, a decision we've all made.
and i've never regretted it.
it's okay we get into different class, let's all view it as a test to our friendship.
and sooner or later, if we don't split class, we might also get separated when we go after out own dreams and aspirations.
perhaps, this might even be a factor which strengthen our friendship.
regardless of what life may bring, at least we were friends.

friends, people that are close to you who impart certain knowledge to you.
some come and go, some sticks.
yet, both are equally important.

was telling wei'en recently liying and weixian were the friends who stuck since primary school.
and i remembered someone--vera.
she stuck by me till secondary 2.
we did not have a fight, nor a tiff, just did not stay in touch--still fatal.
i knew her since primary1
great friends since primary3
8years of acquaintance; 6-7years of friendship; 6 years of schoolmates; 4 years of classmates.
yet, 1 year of silence is fatal enough.
but, fret not, some time i will call her up.
because, she is someone important.
i miss her.
well, i guess she's the most mature person i've met and befriended and one of the few i feel comfortable talking and crapping with.

anyway, i think i deserve a pat on the back for keeping this blog for like 5-going-on-6 months?
though this is only the 31st post which is feat to me, though yianlu can easily do that in like a month containing 31 days.
simply meaning she post daily.
something i can never do.
but !!!!
i still deserve a pat on my back.
well, simply because from all my past experiences, i have never kept to having a blog, starting like 2 per year and letting them rot away.

YEAPPS.
so a PAT !!
and i'm posting longer and longer.
i'm definitely not sure if that's a good thing though, cause i think people prefer quality to quantity ya?
><"

hey !

eh.
wasn't in the mood to post, yet again.

thank you weilun again, for being there for me, yet again.

i'm mending.
but it's okay.
i'll be ready soon.
i'm stronger than i think i am.
and, talking about it. i deserve better.
still, i feel cheated.
but, so there " BYE !"
and that's the end.

sadness, depression--they're all part and parcel of life.
if i don't experience them, i will not be a human.
but, then again, i won't be there for long.
as i am optimistic and forward looking ya?
furthermore, some things just don't deserve to be brooded over.
so, why not?
take things easy and view them in a brighter light.
and thanks, for those who asked me to cheer up.
i guessed it worked !!
a few hours of being alone and listening to music helps =)

what can i say?
immaturity and having problems handling relationship is not my cup of tea.
so there you go.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY DARLING WEI'EN !!
since this opportunity arises, i will tell you that no matter what happen we will be good friends ya?
love you loads.
and guess what !
i'll be celebrating your birthday twice over
=)
i am sure you are over the moon.

it's time to feel happy ya?
the problems are gone!
yet, i am still a teeny weeny not that ready to smile and face the world bravely.
but, i will be
x)

i miss school !!
okayokay.
mainly jamie joyceT and weilun.
jamie and joyceT: cause your are always there to laugh with me.
weilun: you are there to hear my complaints and grumblings.

i kept on mentioning weilun. later people think i like him.
but. your are wrong!
i LOVE him.
it's fine with me, just just as long as he don't misunderstand me himself.
x)

well i came back from chalet !

mostly had a great fun with :
weili, edrei, yinlan, cai er[ yinlan's sis], kaijun, joyceY, seewoon, nguanhan, jiaming, chiensiew, vivien AND other t1 avains !!

well, on the last day, as only weili, edrei, yinlan, cai er, kaijun and i stayed, we were really getting cosy in the chalet! we had a talk and played mahjong till 54o in the morning.
it was really tiring for weili, edrei and kaijun as they had to go to school the next day!

thanks, guys!

then i went back to band room yesterday to do a final clean up.
it was just sunning and re-packing the umbrellas and other stuffs.

afterwards went to do chinese project and went to huan ghee's house to watch pirates 2.
didn't watch ending as went to play a soccer game with weilun.
funfunFUN !
haha.
quite addicted to it though i am a noob at it.



i began to find hope in out friendship, once again.
i were willing to try again, thinking that all would be fine.
yet,
again.
i was disappointed again.
i felt that your social circle is too extensive.
or is it just my problem?
i hope not.

i am just so exasperated and frustrated with everything recently.
i shouldn't be brooding over these things, but i just do.
what should i do, i do not even know.

thank you, weilun!
for being the one beside me when i am feeling depressed ya?
though you get me irritated at times and i feel that you are insensitive to the people around you but you were there.
that meant so much more to me.
thanks for talking to me, and giving advices.
love you!

many a times, people come and go.
never caring and loving enough to be cared and loved back.
let's all be the first to be there for some one before grumbling that they were not there for you ya?
i will try to be there for everyone i care and love, but it is simply impossible.


rather than expecting me to be there, can someone be here for me?
i'm sick of being initiative in relationships, be it friendships or whatever.
what can i say? i am a human too.

i am so looking forward to o1 chalet!
missmissMISS you guys!!
i hope this will be a great chance to repair what is damage to re-find what is lost.
yet, perhaps the things we lost just couldn't be found again as we had each found it with other people.

yesterday was band practice as usual.
and for these three practices that we had, 3quarter of the time i am working and cleaning in the band room.
x(
like yesterday, i didn't even touch my trumpet, only when i was having my music assessment.

still it was very tiring and trying.
termites are -- gross, horrible.
they are: fat and big, thin and small.

and by sir's standard, when we see them, we are lucky and thus is supposed to be happy and not yell and scream.
--because termites are a delicacy.

i am going back to clean up on one of the days yet again.
sorry logistic committee ~~

off to chalet in a couple of hours at coasta sands resort, pasir ris.
3t1 !!
love this class.
though some are muggers, some are real competitive, every individual is a fun-loving person.
and because !!--they can tolerate me!
hahahah.

anyway, was looking at my report book and adding up my cip hours.
18o++ therefore i decide that i want to do until 2oo hours
x)
think i'll be doing 1o sessions of bethany old folks' home.

ciao, people.
i will be back on monday!